Episode 35: Welcome back to You Are the Magic Pill, I’m your host Victoria. On today’s episode I want to encourage you to follow your own heart’s desire, and to know that that’s exactly what you need to do, try not to compare yourself, try not to judge yourself according to other people’s standards and other people’s desires that they want in their life. You take your own path, you do what’s right for you and I have promised you, you’re going to come up out on top, you’re going to rise up. It’s will be amazing and you’re going to be exactly where you need to be. You be you boo!

Listen in…

SHOWNOTES:

• We have the answers within ourselves, but we tend to look outward for those answers, and we seek advice from so many other people. But what we don’t realize is that the people we seek advice are on a different journey, while it’s okay to talk about things with other people. It’s also best to probably sit with yourself and to ask yourself those questions and to see what comes to your mind or what plays out in your reality, what synchronicity happens. Or the things that you start to observe because you asked to see certain things or you are seeking something, then you find it, right? (1:43)

•    And I’ve kinda touched on this before, but it’s really been weighing on my heart lately to talk about it a little bit more in depth, because it’s like we ask other people for this particular advice, but then they give us advice, but it’s based on what their reality is right? So even though we are in this world together, we’re not in the same reality, and we don’t have the same perception because we each have our own upbringing, we each have our own things that we were taught that are true or not true for ourselves, but it is what we were taught. The key is really to listen to yourself, to follow your own guidance and your own intuition, and I’m not saying not ask people stuff, but just do know that it isn’t necessarily going to be the best advice. Because they’re telling you based on what they would do. (2:33)

•   Are you trying to create that in your reality based on that you think that you’re supposed to do this? Because other people are doing this, because society thinks you should do it? Or, are you doing this because you want to? You know what I mean? Because you desire to… So that’s the questions I have to ask myself. Whenever I’m making decisions, it’s like, Okay, how do you feel about that inside… Does it ignite you? Does it bring peace to you or am I pushing it? Am I trying to make this happen based on somebody else’s beliefs, based on somebody else’s journey, based on what I’ve been taught, so that’s where you really have to know thyself, right, because when you know thy self, then you can feel and be able to be in tune with what’s right for your personal path, and it’s just been really such a cool experience to finally see that for myself and to be like, It’s okay if you don’t do a certain thing that other people think you should do. (5:29)

•    And if you don’t know what that is, that’s where you have to start spending time with yourself, because if you’re always following the leader, you’re always following the guidance of other people, then maybe you’re living in their shadows and you’re not truly seeing who you are. So, you gotta take that step to find out who you are, right? If you don’t know… I didn’t use to know that, I’m slowly still discovering that because I’ve always kinda lived in the shadows of other people, and I don’t regret it, it’s fine, it’s just part of my process of this life and part of my experience, and now I’m just kind of realizing that I’m just kind of discovering who I am and what ignites and just lights me up. I’m starting to take different risks to do different things that I didn’t know I would even be doing. (7:26) 

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Episode 18: I want to talk to you today about projecting. Don’t you just want people to stop projecting all over you? And if you don’t know what that means, I want to explain it just a little bit. Projection, basically is whenever somebody is taking their beliefs and opinions and their life experiences and giving you advice or having an opinion about you, or a judgement based on that. And it has absolutely nothing to do with you. Because we’re all in this world running around doing our thing together, but we’re not in the same reality. But honestly, if everybody could really understand projection, then this world could be a little bit of a different place, and because each of us would realize that just because you say something, or I say something and we don’t agree, sometimes it doesn’t necessarily mean that either one of us is right or wrong.

Ready to hear more? Listen in…

IN THIS EPISODE:

•   Why do I always get triggered when someone says something to me? Because when someone says something to you, it’s not about you at all. It’s about them. (3:15)

•   Someone said something to me about me being too thin, and called me a name actually too. And this person wasn’t intending on making me upset or triggering me or anything like that. And honestly, when this person said it to me, I didn’t get super triggered. But I did get like, Oh wait. Why are you saying that to me? And then I had to step back and realize it’s about that person and not me. (4:55)

•   I think that if we just would truly let people live their lives authentically, or just allow people to live their lives and they would actually be able to be authentic, I think that we’re taught so much bullsh*t lies about what we should be and how we should think how I should dress, how we should just be 247, what kind of job we should have, what kind of house we should have, or we should have this amount of money, and you should never do this. (9:34)

•   We’re human, right? I’m just becoming more aware of it, so I’m calming down, and I’m looking at myself more and realizing that I just need to let people be themselves instead of maybe giving unsolicited advice, if somebody asks for my advice that I’m going to base it on what I know about them, and ask them. What do you have a piece about? Where do you see your life? What it brings you joy, what brings you happiness? And what do you want in your life? (11:17)

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IN THIS EPISODE:

Episode 13: I’m excited because I haven’t had a guest on here to talk to you with me until today. I have my friend Withers with me, we’ve known each other for a while now, but we’ve never actually knew that we had something in common. I’m going to let Withers tell you her story, because it is really cool. I was as looking on Instagram about a week or two ago, and I saw this video, and I don’t watch a lot of videos on Instagram or tiktok or anything like that, but I decided to watch it. And so I started listening to her story and she started to share something that was super vulnerable and personal to her, and I was like, Oh my gosh, that reminds me of something that I struggle with, but I’ve actually not shared on the podcast just yet. I want to touch on that a little bit today, and share with you how my story relates to Withers’. But it’s more about her story today.

Ready? Listen in…

• And you know the thing is, I would say with scars, there’s all different types, and there’s emotional scars that we’ve been through, there’s physical scars that everybody can see, which maybe is easier for me because they see it. Emotional scars people can’t see and they don’t understand the pain,you’ve been through. A physical scar, you wear around and they see, Well, she survived something. (5:19)

• When I stood in front of a mirror, a long story short, and I was like, guess what? This is me in a bathing suit, I’m pale, I don’t have any make-up on. When I get really pale, my scars turn purple on my legs, and my father said he’d never even really seen it, I’d been covering it my whole life. He told me that last night, he said, I didn’t really notice that, you’re really good at it, you’re really good at hiding it. (8:09)

• When you focus on what you think is so wrong with yourself, then you lose what’s so right. And I just believe that whole-heartedly. Because for myself, I lost a lot of joy, I lost a lot of fun times because I didn’t want to wear shorts, I didn’t wanna go to the lake, I didn’t want to go out in the sun. It’s like I limited myself and I didn’t enjoy my life. (11:25)

• I dated several guys and I was always looking. I thought my purpose was to find my perfect match. I was looking everywhere and I wanted children, blah, blah, and it occurred to me I have to be able to bring into the situation what I’m asking from a situation. That was the first thing that occurred to me. Secondly, what occurred to me was I had to love myself. It was not until I loved myself. I looked at myself in the mirror and I was like, You know, you’re good looking for these reasons, because you’re a good person, because you’re good, you don’t have to be a beauty queen or Miss Arkansas. But when I started loving myself, I actually volunteered for Big Brothers, Big Sisters. Eliza is my little sis, and seeing her world and seeing what she goes through, and then comparing it and realizing how lucky I was and realizing the capacity I had to do things for others and to stand up for them and not be ashamed and just truly focusing on myself, then it came to me. I met my husband. (17:23)

• People want to see your weaknesses, you think that people want to look at you on Facebook and Instagram and all those things and say, Oh my God, our life is perfect, and blah blah. That’s not how people connect, that’s not how people love you. They love you when you’re honest and you’re like, I’m hurting, or this happened to me, and you can relate on that level. And that is a true friendship, that is something that lasts forever. (21:22)

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Withers’ Video: https://www.instagram.com/stories/highlights/17874572408219138

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Episode #11: Hi and welcome back to You Are the Magic Pill. I am so excited that you’re here with me today. I call this episode, don’t tell me what to do, because I don’t know about you, but when someone tells me what to do, I just don’t really like it. And I think that I know why I don’t like it, it’s because it triggers me a little bit. I think it’s because of my childhood and my upbringing. I was the youngest in my family, and so I was constantly told what to do, and I never really had to make a decision, because all my decisions were basically made for me. Throughout much of my life for me. I lacked the confidence to think that I could make a decision. I let other people guide me and live my life. I was just like this person going about and doing what people told me to do. So I think… Now, when people try to tell me what to do, I’m like, Oh yeah, I don’t like that.

Listen in to hear more…

IN THIS EPISODE:

•   Basically, I got married at 19 because I didn’t know who I was. I didn’t believe in myself. I bought into the fact that I would never make it out of my own. That  I would never be anything. And that this is what I should do. (3:00)

•    We have these experiences that happen in our lives, and then when we make those choices and we have things happen, then that allows us to have that contrast and then we’re like, Okay, I’m not going to to do that again, I learned what I needed to learn. (4:48)

•    If you just kinda let other people guide you, let other people determine your future, take a pause and think about that and really feel what’s going on in your body, and if it feels right, that’s great. But if it doesn’t feel right, and you feel like you’ve been inserted into somebody else’s life or into a job, or into whatever it is you’re doing, that you feel like that it doesn’t feel like you belong, or it doesn’t feel like what was meant for you. Then take a pause and think about it. (7:39)

•     So we all need to just go within, you need to search within your own heart and go that path, go that narrow path, and that is where you find your bliss, that’s what you’ll find your happiness. (9:08)

WAYS TO CONNECT:

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Episode #8. Hi, and welcome back to You Are the Magic Pill. Today I thought that we should talk a little bit more about confidence, because a lot of people struggle with it. Having confidence really does matter, because what affects one person affects another. You make a difference, and when you have confidence, you show up ready to do this thing called life.

“Look inside yourself; everything that you want, you already are.” … Achieve some perfection yourself, so that you may not fall into sorrow by seeing the perfection in others.” ~ Rumi

IN THIS EPISODE:

•   You’re getting up and you’re taking action, and you’re becoming your best version, and you’re making a difference on this planet, you’re becoming more confident, because you’re choosing to go within. (2:30)

•   I wouldn’t do it if it’s causing you grief or causing you to compare too much, find that special-ness that you have within you, run with that, follow your bliss, follow your heart. (5:15)

•   Look at others and see, Wow, that person’s awesome. Look at what they’re doing, if it triggers you, then maybe you see yourself doing that too, maybe you desire to be doing something like that, then go down that path and explore it. (6:07)

•  I challenge you today, find that within yourself and go out in the world and make a difference, you’ve got this, I believe in you. Now go Believe in yourself,(7:27)

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Episode #5. Hi, and welcome back to You Are the Magic Pill. I want to talk to you today about the Four Agreements. Have you ever read that book? If you never read that book, I highly recommend it. And actually, if you’ve read it, I recommend reading again, because you very well may read something that you didn’t see before. I recently did a post about the Four Agreements, because I just love it so much. Today I want to give you the Victoria recap, and my version does not do it justice, but I want to just give highlights of what I walked away with… This is actually from 2019, so when I go back and read it now, I’m certain I will see some things differently. My perception of it is going to be different. Ready for the Victoria recap?

IN THIS EPISODE:

•   If you don’t have anything nice to say, then don’t say it at all. (2:06)
•   Remember when we used to run around and say, ‘I’m rubber, you’re glue, and anything you say bounces off me and sticks to you’? (2:50)
•   If you have that confidence in yourself and you know who you truly are, you can just not even let it affect you. (3:46)
•   Perfect is whatever you want it to be.  (6:09)

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