Episode #44: Welcome to You Are the Magic Pill, I’m your host Victoria, thank you so much for joining me. Today I am so excited because I’m bringing back my bestie Richele Batt to talk about red flags in dating and relationships. We talk about addressing the issues that you know are there, and then when they come up, seeing what the response from the other person is, and if it gets addressed by them. If they care to change something, or maybe if you’re just not a match, and trusting your intuition, yourself and your gut feeling.

Ready? Listen in…

SHOWNOTES:

•  Yeah, and so it’s about loving yourself enough to know your value and to leave your situation when you know it’s not good for you, or not getting into a situation that you know is a huge red flag. There’s a couple of funny memes that I’ve seen that are hilarious one is perfect for Valentine’s day, because this guy is holding a dozen red flags and she goes, ‘Oh a dozen red flags, I love him so much’, and then there’s another one where he says ‘Good morning beautiful’. And she says, ‘Take me off rotation’.  (8:05)

•  When that happens, I think is a very important to know what to do. So I think a lot of times people don’t do anything because they don’t know what to do, they either cut bait and go or they don’t do anything. So I think the important thing is to tell people what do you do at that point. Well, that’s where communication skills come in, you have to know how to open your mouth and speak. And you know what? It may be a little scary to communicate with someone, especially someone you only just started knowing. I’m like, Listen, first of all, you have to have healthy boundaries. And you have to know what those are. If your boundary is, I need to be respected, like say someone stood you up on a date or something like that. That’s probably a boundary. You carve out your time for that person, they decide the last minute they’re not going or something, and they act like it’s no big deal, that’s a red flag. And it’s something that needs to be addressed now. (12:40)

•  There’s so much integrity in realizing, Okay, we’re not a match. I tell people, ‘You’re not dating to make it a match, you’re dating to see if it is one, and so even when you go through break ups and such, and I’ve had episodes about breakups, sometimes you complete a relationship and it’s about the two people realizing, Okay, this is not working, this is not going to be… We’re not compatible for whatever reason, and sometimes they’re very difficult. But as long as you do look and realize, Okay, there’s lessons to be learned from here in this relationship, and you take those to heart and you go on in the future and say, Okay, now I know what I need and what I want, and hopefully the other person does too, and you help each other grow… What is better than that? I mean, that’s what we all want to do. So you’re not forcing it to be a match… I think some people get in a relationship and think I have to make this work, I have to… I have to… And they’re just like, beating their head against the wall. What’s the point of that?  (19:33)

•   I was married for 20 years and you were married for a long time, we have an our story from it, right? We have our experience from it, so do our spouses are ex’s. They have their story and what they learned from it, neither is wrong or right to be honest. It’s what we both needed. But whenever I was married, my life felt like, my soul that like, I was like dead. So I felt like my life was being sucked out of me, and I don’t blame that on my ex, it’s just the relationship wasn’t meant to continue. He didn’t suck the life out of me, it was the relationship that was no longer serving me…or him. And so I had to make the decision, I had to be strong enough and listen to that gut feeling, listen to my inner voice saying, ‘You are not supposed to be here anymore, get out. (22:44)

CONNECT WITH RICHELE:

Visit my website: CoachingCloset.com
Connect on free Facebook Group: CoachingClosetConnect.com
Follow me on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/607035253196498
 

CONNECT WITH VICTORIA:

Website: YouAretheMagicPill.com
Facebook: facebook.com/youarethemagicpill

Episode 17: Welcome back to You Are the Magic Pill. Today, I’m excited because I have a very good friend on today, Richele Batt. Listen in to our conversation as we discuss relationships, unconditional love, red flags and should you stay or should you go?

Listen in…

IN THIS EPISODE:

•    So a lot of people think you can’t love someone and let them go, but the truth is, with our divorce rate, obviously that’s not the case, and relationships do end. It’s not because of a lack of love, many times it’s because of the toxicity of the relationship and is it healthy anymore? Many times it’s just people realize that it’s not good for them to stay and they have to give it up for them to love themselves the most and for them to be healthy. (1:28)

• Many times, if you could get to a point in your life where you just don’t feel like you even know who you are, because you’ve become an extension of this other person. Like, who is Richele? I got to a point where I was like, What do I even like? Because I don’t know, I’m just an extension of this person, I’m his wife is… I’m their mom. What do I like? I don’t know, I’m just an extension or I’m only allowed? That’s a really key word there, I’m only allowed to do these certain things. (4:17)

• That’s where you get into power and control, where one person holds all the power and the other person, it’s like you’re dimming yourself down, you’re giving your power away, you’re not speaking up for yourself, and you’re living in fear, and you’re walking on egg shells and you’re just like, Okay, you’re just really doing anything you can to avoid triggering that person into anger or rage, and that’s a huge red flag that you are in a very toxic situation. That’s when it’s like the relationship going way down. (6:39)

• Until I started getting sick, I really just didn’t want to leave. But yeah, it does happen. So if you’re in that position and you’re like, What’s wrong with me? Why am I sick? And your relationship isn’t good, you might want to consider that it’s your stress level, it’s the relationship, so that needs to be a red flag as well. (13:26)

• Yeah, I’m at a level of self-love that I never had before, and I just love teaching people that. That’s where you have to start, and it just brings tears to my eyes, it really does. It’s an honor to help people. It really is. To absolutely love it. It’s just my passion. (18:19)

ABOUT RICHELE BATT:

Richele is a coach, YouTube TV host and soon to be podcaster. Her passion is  to help you find your beauty from the inside out.

​Richele wants to give you the power you need to understand that at the end of the day YOU are the essence and source of what happens in your life.  You deserve to be confident in who YOU ARE. 

“Those Who Do Not Learn History Are Doomed To Repeat It …’ Learn YOUR history, embrace it and STOP repeating patterns that did not SERVE YOU in the past.

CONNECT WITH RICHELE:

Richele’s Website: https://coachingcloset.com
Richele’s YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com
Richele’s Facebook: https://www.facebook.com
Richele’s Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/richele_livejoy
Richele’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/coachingcloset
 

CONNECT WITH VICTORIA:

Visit my website: www.youarethemagicpill.com
Follow me on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/youarethemagicpill