Episode 34: Welcome back to You Are the Magic Pill, I’m your host Victoria. Today I want to talk to you about that one time that I dated an alcoholic. So, I was dating this person, and everything seemed to be going really well, and I did kinda notice a few things that were a little strange, maybe red flags, but I continued to go out with this person. Then after about a couple of months, I was just like, I don’t think this is the right fit for me, and I proceeded to break up. That didn’t go over very well, and that’s when I realized that this person was actually an alcoholic and I had no idea, I really didn’t know, which is kind of strange, but I didn’t because I guess there’s different types of alcoholics and he was more of a binge drinker. While he was with me, he didn’t really go off into a binge period until I broke up with him, and then I realized that that’s what was happening because he was kind of verbally abusive to me through text and phone calls. I decided to continue the relationship because I just felt still connected to him and that I was supposed to continue the relationship, it didn’t feel right in my soul to let go just yet.
• Everybody has their own own way that they’re going to go through what they need to go through in order to find their way back to themselves. You just have to let it play out and be supportive and not so judgmental and not projecting what you think they should do because of your perception and what you would choose to do because you might not need what that person needs. In whatever particular situation they’re in, whether it be a relationship or a job or anything, you just might not… You might not need that, but they do, to jot them, to wake them up to who they truly are or to see the shadow within themselves. (4:14)
• I didn’t understand all the projections and what people say and the triggers and how that’s a shadow within me and how relationships help us see the things that we need to see about ourselves as individuals. And it’s there for that purpose, to help us grow and sometimes push us, and honestly, this particular relationship was like the final piece that I needed to really help me to go within and find that power and belief and love for myself. I had already gotten to that level of where I love myself and I had confidence and I felt really good, but there was just that one little piece left, (7:04)
• I’ve learned what I need to learn, I’m okay, I can break free now, I can walk away and I’m okay, and he’ll be okay, he will finish out his path, his journey, exactly how he needs to. We came in to one another’s lives to show us what we needed to see. You either see it and integrate it and move on to the next level, or you break free from that moment or that relationship, and you repeat it again, until you get judged again to try to go within, to see it again, and you keep doing it over and over until you finally, like me in this particular situation, because it’s not my first toxic relationship. (10:19)
• My message today is just how I dated an alcoholic, or why that happened. I have zero regrets about it, I am thankful and grateful that I went through that experience and I care about this person because he played his part in my life, and he showed me what I needed to see in order to rise up and become more whole and to love myself even more, To realize who I truly am, so for that I’m grateful and it allowed me to attract the new person in my life that is on the frequency that I’m on now. If you’re in an abusive relationship or a toxic relationship, know that you don’t have to stay there, that you can learn what you need to learn and then break free when it’s the right time, but just trust the process and realize that you brought that into your life and that you can also release yourself from it. (14:15)
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